first off you might be right about the coaches, or you may have some coaches that don't have a clue how to treat players. yes some players do better with alittle "loud" push, but some, like daughter, only get more upset and push away. your daughter might not understand the tasks that are being asked of her, yes it might be that simple. all you can do as a parent is let her know, no matter what the out come, you are proud of her. i tell my players as well as my own kids (7 of them) if you are happy with your performance, then so am i. she may also be letting you know in her own way, hey i don't want to play basketball....talk to her about this possiblity as well.

YOU MAY HAVE A CHILD WHO DOESN'T WANT TO PLAY BALL. ASK HER AND TELL HER IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU PLAY SPORTS BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE

I am glad you ask Coach Willie 30 years of basketball service, First she must
find one sport she will committ too, then put the time and deciation, then she
will achieve the love for the game. Even if she plays two instead of three we
can focus and have more time. www.Lifechangingathletics.biz

I think that it is okay for her to play different sports. But she has to realize that she is going to work harder at each sport to be successful. She has to have the discipline to work at each sport and better herself each day. Success comes from hard work.

Point out what see does well and then add a (but if you do this or that it my work better for you). We have the opposite problem with our daughter some times she needs to be brought back down to earth. Talk to the coach and explain that his method may not work for her. Some coaches have trouble with the individual personalities of their players. I always had an assistant and we would use "Good Coach Bad Coach" Method. The worst thing most parents do is tell their child they are doing well when they are not. Be truthful but try to focus on the positive.

First of all I think it is important for you to know who is answering the question , so you can put the answer in perspective! There are definitely different ways to go about the issue. As for me, I am a coach:
This is plain simple to me. There is no place for "backup" players when coaching 13 year-olds. The coaches sole job in that age group is to instill a love for the game in the kids, to teach them the skills necessary to play and to teach them how to play rather than running plays! You also have to teach them to play together...and that definitely does not work by edging 5 players out. This coach is - bluntly put - coaching the wrong age group. So my advice would be, get your son out of that team and find a new one!

Sorry, I posted the previous answer accidentally in the wrong section!